Balance

In spending any amount of time with Quinn, in thinking about what to do next with him, I think about what he has already done that day or what might be coming up, and try to choose something to do that will balance his day. For example, if he has not had much touch time I'll pick him up and walk around with him; or if we're going to a family get-together where he'll be held a lot, I'll give him some self-time on the floor. If he's been laying down a lot I'll sit him up in a kid-chair for self-time. If he looks bored sometimes I'll get him a toy, but sometimes self-time without a toy encourages him to explore his fingers or experiment with his voice. Sometime I talk to him, sometimes I echo his utterings, and sometimes I'm just quiet and listen to him. Sometimes I actively adore him and sometimes I just go about what needs doing with him watching - passively adoring him. The list of examples could go on and on.

Mothers seem to do all this very intuitively and instinctively. Sometimes I have no idea what to do with him next, but sometimes I feel some of the same instincts. The more time I spend with him the better I get at it. This was one of the single largest benefits of my month off.

Interestingly, I don't always make these balancing choices for myself, and as a result I suspect many of my days end up out of balance. I also suspect that over time, intuition guides me to do things that create the required balance. It would be probably be an improvement though, if I could actively and consciously balance my days better.